First of all, let me confirm that anger against sin is appropriate and that God is angry with the sin of pornography and every type of adultery!
See God’s angry response in scripture, 1 Kings 11:9:
So the LORD became angry with Solomon, because his heart had turned from the LORD God of Israel.
Look at our Lord’s response to those whose hearts had turned from God in Matthew 21:12-13:
Then Jesus went into the temple of God and drove out all those who bought and sold in the temple, and overturned the tables of the money changers and the seats of those who sold doves. And He said to them, “It is written, ‘My house shall be called a house of prayer,’ but you have made it a ‘den of thieves.’
People often think anger is wrong but look closer at what Jesus said in Matthew 5:22:
“But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment.
If your husband is using pornography you have great cause to be angry.
Whether he is a Christian or not, his heart has wandered from you and he is not being faithful.
The big question about anger is what to do with it?
We are shown in Ephesians 4:26-27…
“Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.”
So if the wrong expression of anger is sin and gives the devil a foothold, how could it possibly be used in a positive way?
Pain is a great motivator.
Regardless of how you express your anger, its source is some type of pain you feel. And if the pain does not go away or get better, it will either force you into action or wear you down.
If anger wears you down, you will grow bitter and most likely, you’ll grow angry at God as well.
If anger forces you into action, you might take the wrong action, like revenge.
But if you direct your anger at the problem rather than at a person, you’ll likely draw closer to God.
If you trust that God is sovereign over all things and He alone is wise enough, strong enough and loving enough to help you face hardships with His perspective, you won’t be as likely to sin.
Look at the problem Moses faced the first time, but went to God for help, rather than exploding in anger in Exodus 17:3-6
And the people thirsted there for water, and the people complained against Moses, and said, “Why is it you have brought us up out of Egypt, to kill us and our children and our livestock with thirst?”
So Moses cried out to the LORD, saying, “What shall I do with this people? They are almost ready to stone me!”
And the LORD said to Moses, “Go on before the people, and take with you some of the elders of Israel. Also take in your hand your rod with which you struck the river, and go.
“Behold, I will stand before you there on the rock in Horeb; and you shall strike the rock, and water will come out of it, that the people may drink.” And Moses did so in the sight of the elders of Israel.
Look how Moses sinned when he focused his anger on people in Numbers 20:10-12:
And Moses and Aaron gathered the assembly together before the rock; and he said to them, “Hear now, you rebels! Must we bring water for you out of this rock?”
Then Moses lifted his hand and struck the rock twice with his rod; and water came out abundantly, and the congregation and their animals drank.
Then the LORD spoke to Moses and Aaron, “Because you did not believe Me, to hallow Me in the eyes of the children of Israel, therefore you shall not bring this assembly into the land which I have given them.”
Anger is not an emotion you must hide from God. He sees your heart and He knows your motives. Just be sure to examine your heart and be certain that your anger is aligned with God’s.
Anger can blind us and we can be more concerned about our own comfort and demands, rather than the interests of God.