“If I had only known what kind of man he was before I married him,
I never would have married him!”
Have you ever thought you married Mr. Wrong?
When I learned that my husband had been involved in pornography most of his life, I was appalled that I could have been so easily deceived. It wasn’t just the betrayal, but also the shame I felt at being fooled for so long.
You may wonder similar things when you learn of your mate’s deception. Although it may be a newsflash to you, God knew all along.
So do we blame God for not protecting us, or do we die a slow death from deep regret that we made such a bad choice?
What if those questions led us to hope, instead of blame and regret?
What if God wants you to love the way He does, unconditionally, because He made a covenant with you?
God knew what you were like before He adopted you into His family. Yet, He swore to never leave you nor forsake you. You still don’t measure up to His standard of perfect holiness, but He is faithful to complete the work which He began in you and will someday accept you into glory.
God’s commitment to you is certain. He gave His word and cannot break it.
Is it possible He wants you to be just as committed to your marriage as He is to you?
If so, take lessons from your Father; ask for His grace and strength to love without conditions.
Don’t confuse love with abuse or enablement. God disciplines those He loves.
You can learn to set appropriate boundaries that will facilitate you to love unconditionally. Don’t be afraid draw lines in the sand.
Above all, don’t allow heartache to limit your capacity to be conformed to the likeness of Christ.
Perhaps as you become more like Christ, God just might use you to transform your husband into Mr. Right!
If you need help setting healthy boundaries with a cheating spouse, find hope, guidance and support here: BEYOND BETRAYAL BLUEPRINT